Aug. 3rd, 2004

Entermation

Aug. 3rd, 2004 12:37 am
jere7my: muskrat skull (Default)
It's like infotainment, but three times better!

This site is far too much fun. It invents products. For instance:
  • jere7my is a fax machine! It sticks to the skin!
  • LiveJournal is a hearing aid that's made of glass!
  • Kendra is a credit card that anticipates your every move! It keeps your teeth clean.
  • shelkesem is a video recorder that kills all known germs dead, jumps like a frog and improves upper-body muscle.
  • showergrrl is a featureless cube that increases your sex appeal and recharges itself at night.
  • flammifera is a business card that's completely reversible and vibrates.
I make no comments.

K. and I ate at a Chinese restaurant between Pinewoods and NYC that gave us chopsticks. Not only were the chopstick instructions in Engrish, but they had been scanned by a crappy text recognition program. Thus:
  • Tuk under thur nb and held firmly
  • Add second chcostick
  • Hold tirst chopstick in originai position


I bought one of those hefty-man box-strapping tape dispensers to aid in packing. The instructions open with a warning, which I reproduce here in full:
! CAUTION
• To reduce the risk associated with a sharp edge, which if not avoided, may result in minor or moderate injury:

- Avoid contact with sharp blade.
(Needless to say, I suffered a minor or moderate injury within minutes of opening the package.)

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